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Ok, I am currently loving Lizzo! Her whole aura is a MOOD! Her confidence is a level I aspire to reach. This song came out just in time. As I approach 30, I’m realizing some shit about myself, that makes me question, Why did it take me this long to realize, I’m my own soulmate!! For as long as I can remember, I looked toward someone to fill the role of a soulmate in my life. Looking at my man as the one who completes me. Now don’t get me wrong, you should definitely find someone who completes you and adds to all that you are. But girl if you don’t love you first.

This lesson was hard. My best friend – after a long conversation about what my last relationship taught me asked, How do you love yourself? I hesitated like hell. One, I have never been asked that before and two, didn’t even have an answer. I had no idea what to say. In my most recent relationship, there were a lot of things that I allowed. Things that, if I truly and clearly loved myself, the way I thought I did – would have never happened. Disrespect, allowing myself to apologize when I did nothing wrong, mean and intentional jabs, and consistent forgiveness for the same behavior. It was the first time I understood, how can you tell someone to love you if you don’t know how to love yourself.

Now, eventually, I had my answers – always speak positivity, forgiving myself, spending time, challenging myself, respect for myself and others, boundaries, standing in peace, doing things that make ME feel good and a few more, but you get the point. It took me some time to think about it. When I thought of these things, this song came to mind. So I listened to it again, and again. I decided this time, I’m really going to do for me.

Learning to love yourself can be hard. Not solely because it is hard to love yourself (we are truly our own worst critics) but because it requires us to look at things about ourselves that we may not like or may not know how to change. But it’s worth it. Honey, when you learn how to love yourself, no man or woman can treat you less. You allow yourself to walk in grace and confidence. It allows you to shine, let your amazing, God-Given light shine.

So this year, I challenge you. Write down all the ways you love yourself. And if you don’t know, write down all the things you’ve allowed others to do that hurt you or disrupt your peace. Write down all the things you Love about yourself. Take the time to get to know you, what you love, hate, want to work on and what you want to strut across the runway. And become your own soulmate, spend time doing things you love, because you should always be the first priority. Be your own type, be your OWN SOULMATE. Choose You Girl. YOU.

“True love ain’t something you can buy yourself
True love finally happens when you by yourself
So if you by yourself, then go and buy yourself
Another round from the bottle on the higher shelf.”

Drop some ways you love yourself!

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